David

My cousin, David, would have been 36 today.  I wish his boys were not growing up without their dad, that his brother was not without him, that his mom did not lose her child...yet, I take comfort in knowing where he is.  Someday we will see him again.

Me and David a LONG time ago

Facebook Comfort

I believe that facebook has changed the moods of stay at home moms nationwide.

When my children are behaving badly or when I have (again) failed as a parent, I find myself turning to facebook.  From the moment that I click on the status button and express my feelings, I take comfort in seeing how many likes or comments I will receive from the other moms who are going through the same thing.

It makes me feel less alone.

This week was a great example.  Noah had an explosion two nights ago.  You all know what I mean.  The kind where the diaper fails to hold it all in, it ends up on the pajamas, the sheets, the stuffed animals, the pillow, the actual crib...just so awesome.

As I placed the little culprit in the tub and stripped him down in order to spray off the chunks (I told you-so awesome), I thought about how comforting this would be to write about on facebook later.  Instead of feeling alone (Nick was working late...because that is when these things happen...when Nick is working late), I knew other moms would feel my pain in facebook land.

Same thing happened last night.  I was getting ready to check on Abby before going to bed when I heard her crying in her room.  I walked in and saw vomit-everywhere.  On the bed, the side of the bed, the floor, on her American Girl doll, on a handmade scarf, on another doll, on some toys...shall I go on?

As I carried each item to the tub to rinse off, I thought, "I am not alone-other moms have to do this-I will share my misery with them in the morning in facebook land."  While my husband comforted our little girl (funny how that was his job and mine was to take chunks of puke off of stuff), I had to find the humor in it and keep on going. 

Not only did I find camaraderie in other moms in the same boat, but I also found helpful hints on how to get the stink out and how to clean certain items.

What did moms do before facebook?  Seriously?  I would have been so lonely.

In fact, I was.  I went through the sleepless, newborn nights with Abby long before I heard of this online social networking place.  And I felt alone.  Yes, I had some mom friends at our former church, but I often felt left out and on my own.  We lived in an apartment and I was lacking the kind neighbors that I am now blessed with.  I was very tired, very discouraged, and had no idea what I was doing.

I am not saying that facebook saves the day in all cases.  But, I am saying it is a comfort to know that other people are going through the same struggles and joys on a daily basis, no matter how far away they are.

To my friends on facebook that are not in the same stage of life as me, my apologies-you probably do not want to hear about poopy diapers, vomit, and day to day frustrations from mommyland.  But, please keep in mind that other moms do want to hear about it-it makes them feel less alone, too.

Say what you will about facebook ruining the way that we communicate.  For this mom who can never finish a conversation on the phone while children are nearby, it has been a blessing.

What Did You Say?

Anyone who has toddlers knows this popular game...

It is called, "What did you say?"

The rules are:  The toddler says something, the parent tries to figure out what he or she is saying, the parent guesses, and the toddler either nods in agreement or screams with frustration.  The volume of the scream determines exactly how quickly the parent hurries to win the game.

We currently play this game a lot in our house.

The other day at breakfast, Noah kept asking for "nix."  I could not for the life of me figure out what "nix" was so I kind of ignored him while I packed the older two kid's backpacks for school.  After his screams of "nix" got louder, Abby guessed, "mix?" to which Noah nodded.  Okay, so that was no help.  What did he want me to mix?  After more screams and frustration, I finally guessed, "Kix?" to which he excitedly nodded and smiled.

The kid just wanted a second helping of Kix. 

This morning, while Caleb was playing Wii, Noah kept yelling "My nuts!  My nuts!"

Um, what?

I thought perhaps he was asking for the nunchucks (we humor him by letting him think he is playing with the nunchucks that are not on).  Caleb handed him one and he threw it down, yelling, "My nuts!  My nuts!"

Tell us how you really feel, Noah.

Finally, Caleb realized that Noah was asking for a stuffed monkey.  He gave it to him and made his little brother very happy.  Apparently, the name of the monkey is Coconut and that is what Noah was trying to say.  Not monkey, but Coconut.

Sure.

What made it even more awesome was when he hugged and monkey and said, "My nuts!  My nuts!" with a big smile on his face.

You cannot make this stuff up.

Someday, Noah will be able to communicate with clear and precise words, but for now, the game continues.