It started with the Easter candy.
Abby had her basket in her room, but wisely shut the door before we left for church on Sunday morning. We came home, changed and left again for dinner with the family. The door was left open.
Molly, being the wise dog that she is, found the basket while we were away. We came home to discover the basket empty-which means she ate about 8 little eggs, a chocolate bunny, 2 marshmallow bunnies, and a pack of gum. An entire pack of gum.
Fine, Molly. Good luck with that.
Oh, but wait. It gets better.
The next day, we went out for a few hours to see a movie with the kids. I specifically moved the little bags of candy that the kids got from the family dinner further up on the counter, high enough away that she would never reach them.
Or so I thought.
We came home, saw wrappers all over the house and saw Molly hiding in shame. I walked into the kitchen and found even more horror.
Two plastic containers were turned upside down on the kitchen floor, lids popped open, completely empty. The contents that were missing? Pepperoni puffs and chocolate chip cookies.
So, let us take a final count. Easter chocolate, more Easter chocolate, pepperoni puffs, and chocolate chip cookies. All within two days.
Molly acted fine. She had boundless amounts of energy (who wouldn't, after that much sugar?) and was having normal bathroom breaks.
Well, last night it finally caught up with her.
It started with the smelly farts. We kept taking her out and she finally had diarrhea (yes, I am sure that you all want to know that). I went to bed, but as I was falling asleep, I heard Nick express concern (that is my polite way of saying it) that he found poo in the loft.
I love how she never just has an accident. It is multiple accidents. Sprinkled all over the place with love. So kind of her.
I cleaned it up the best that I could, considering that we were out of carpet cleaner. Then we discovered another accident. A lot of her special treats all through the downstairs bathroom. Thankfully it is tile. Except for the small cream colored rug. Which is where she decided to leave the biggest deposits.
Finally cleaned everything up, took Molly out where she threw up and went again (oh, and slipped out of her collar and took off until we cornered her a few houses down), finally went to bed and Molly eventually followed us. After the second fart woke us from our sleep, we took her out. While walking back upstairs, I thought I noticed something on the living room floor. I turned on the light and low and behold-more poop. Lots of it. On my cream colored carpet.
FYI-when you have kids and a dog, never have cream colored carpet. Never. Just don't do it. Please.
So, around midnight, Nick drove to Kroger to get carpet cleaner and we attacked the floor the best that we could. Then we put Molly in the downstairs bathroom and attempted to go to sleep.
Apparently, Molly did not agree with our decision. She barked. And barked. And barked.
There was not kind language coming from our mouths last night. There was discussion of how smart Molly's former owners were by letting her run away and how it would not be the worst thing in the world if the chocolate did her in.
I am not proud of it, but I challenge anyone to have a positive attitude at this point in the story.
Many attempts were made to sleep last night. Every time we thought it was over, she would start again. I think at some point she stopped. Either that, or I just gave up and was in denial and slept through her yapping.
So, here we are this morning. Constant trips outside for her, while the carpet cleaners are coming this afternoon. The carpet guy was laughing at me on the phone. You are hilarious, carpet guy. Hilarious.
Oh, and just to clarify-Molly devoured her breakfast and is still following Noah around for possible crumbs. Unbelievable.