Went to the Understanding Poverty class that I am attending this month at church. Five weeks does not seem like enough time for our middle to upper class group to really understand poverty. However, it has led to some great discussion so far and at least with this group, the conversation is leading to specific ideas of what to do in our community and beyond. It is one thing to talk about it, but another thing to actually do something.
In the midst of asking the big question, "If God loves the poor, then why does he let them stay that way?" we had to ask the same for Haiti. In a country that is already a mess, why must something like this happen? All I can think (besides the traditional answer of "it's a fallen world and the earth itself falls victim to its brokeness") is that perhaps some of the Haitians will fall on their knees to the Savior they ultimately need. Regardless of the reason, my heart is broken for those who have suffered greatly this week.
What I found particularly frustrating is when I left my class and went to pick up my children from the kid room, Abby started talking back to me and crying about not getting to play something "just one more time." As the crying continued on in the car, I quietly said, "Do you know all those people who were hurt by the earthquake yesterday? They have a reason to cry."
Okay-so it was a lousy thing to say to a five-year old who really is normal for crying over such things. I have just been overwhelmed dealing with the tears over things that are quite ridiculous in my mind. Usually I have Nick around to take over for a few hours. Much of my time this past week has been spent trying to organize the random stuff around the house. I am big on getting rid of stuff that we do not use and it seems the donation piles I make never seem to go away. I take bags to drop-off centers, yet will still find more within a month. So, when my daughter is crying about things like not wanting to clean up her room (that is filled with way too many items), I just do not feel the sympathy.
When I made the comment in the car, she did quiet down quickly. Then she went into thinking mode and finally said, "Did you know that lots of kids in the world don't even have Bibles?" Apparently, this was what she learned in her class tonight. She continued talking about wanting to get Bibles to people and help them. To which I immediately felt guilty for expecting my little girl to have the maturity of my 32 years (which is not that much greater, I must admit).
As much as I worry about money and wonder how the bills will get paid each month, I am daily reminded of His providence. Everything we have is from Him and even if we were to lose all of our "stuff," He remains faithful. I hope these words would still come from me if I were faced with the destruction that so many are facing right now.